Published on Jul 28, 2022
Strict Parents: Is It Good for Children to Have Strict Parents?
Did you grow up in a strict environment? Are you a controlling parent? If yes, you probably know how it feels to be raised by strict parents. Based on your childhood experiences, you have your own opinions on how parenting should be done. So, is it right to have strict parents?
Parents can be strict for various reasons, and they may not be aware that they are strictly raising their children. Parenting is often overly simplified in this dualistic way. Strict parenting resonates with authoritarian parenting techniques and is exactly the opposite of gentle parenting.
Strict parents always have high expectations from their children. But is this type of parenting beneficial in the long run? In this article, you'll learn about strict parents and the signs and effects of strict parenting.
What is Strict Parenting?
Strict parenting means rigid enforcement of rules and regulations where parents put clear boundaries for their children on what to do and what not to. Children have to do as their parents say and have full control over their behavior, decisions, and everyday activities.
Strict parents have high expectations and demands from their children and inflict harsh punishments if their standards are not maintained.
Parents want to raise their children to excel in everything and turn into strict parents. They don't want to raise defiant kids, and lenient parenting is often believed to cause defiance in children. They think that one can only be either permissive parents or strict parents.
Signs You Are A Strict Parent
If a parent possesses the following signs, they are said to be strict.
1.You have many restrictions for your child.
Is your child the first one to leave a party and run home? Then you might be a strict parent. If a parent has set restrictions and time limits on when to go out, then they are strict parents. Strict parents don't let their children go with their friends for a sleepover, a school tour, or nights out staying late.
2. You children lie a lot.
If your children make up excuses to hide things from you, it can result from being too strict. They deviate from the truth to avoid getting scolded and punished.
3. You don't tolerate their behavior.
While setting clear rules and boundaries is essential, children can make mistakes. However, strict parents can't accept such behavior and take an authoritarian stance on their behavior.
4. You have zero patience for their lightness.
Most kids love ridiculous jokes and silly games. And while those jokes can get old fast, and childish behavior can slow you down, it's important to enjoy the moment and have fun sometimes.
5. You don't have two-way communication.
Strict parents are unknown about their children's social life and what they like or dislike outside their homes. The conversation between parents and children is one way, i.e., parents talk, and children listen without talking back.
6. You nag and yell a Lot
Strict parents nag and yell at little things, which makes the children frustrated. If they don't do as their parents say, they start to scream and nag at them fiercely.
7. You repeatedly hand out directions.
If you're always saying things like, "Sit up straight," "stop shaking your feet," and "do this," do that," then you are being too strict on your children. They should do whatever they like and learn from their mistakes.
8. You give harsh punishment.
Even if they make a small error, strict parents don't find it acceptable and hand them tough lectures and punishments.
9. Your children don't share their feelings with you.
You are counted as a strict parent if your children shy away from sharing their emotions and feelings with you. They don't seem comfortable expressing humor or sadness, either.
10. You praise the result more than their effort.
Strict parents often praise the children's results but have no consideration for their effort and hard work.
Positive Effects of Strict Parenting
Following are the positive results that come with being strict parents.
i. Academic Achievement
One of the first positive outcomes of strict parenting is the change in academic scores. Often, strict parents push their children to excel in their studies and are trained to aim high, which results in better academic performance.
Children with strict parents are self-confident kids who learn to work hard and deal with tough situations. They learn to earn success without being praised or spoiled and make healthy decisions.
Strict parents are consistent with maintaining discipline, and this helps children to learn self-discipline. This self-discipline will come in handy when they come to tough decisions.
Strict parenting results in children being independent and thinking for themselves. They learn many things at a young age and understand the value of work and money, cultivating good habits to be self-dependent.
Children raised in a strict household know very well the meaning of responsibility, and parents teach them to take accountability for their acts from a young age which helps them in their future too.
Negative Effects of Strict Parenting
Following are the negative effects of being strict parents.
i. Low Self Esteem
Strict parents do not value their children's opinions and are snubbed for voicing their ideas or concerns. This makes the children doubt their decisions and could show poor self-esteem behavior.
ii. Cannot think independently
Children raised by strict parents cannot make their own decisions and lack independence. They never get to listen to their intuition to make a decision.
iii. Passive nature
Strict parenting results in children being passive, inactive, and refusing to control their own lives.
iv. Mentally rigid
Children of strict parents become tough and fixed because of the strict environment at their home. They cannot view the whole picture in life because of being mentally stern.
v. Hide emotions
Over time, children raised by strict parents learn to suppress their feelings and emotions, as they apprehend that conveying sentiments is improper.
Children learn mostly through their parents and household backgrounds. When children use a strict parenting style, some results may be positive, while some are negative.
So it is necessary to assess the right parenting model for your children. However, strict parenting is not preferred like authoritative parenting, where children are raised within boundaries but with a loving and caring nature. Happy Parenting!
Frequently Asked Questions
I. What happens when a parent is too strict?
If a parent is too strict, it pressures the children and changes their thinking process, causing issues such as low self-esteem, telling lies, going away from home, etc.
II. What are examples of strict parents?
Some examples of strict parents are:
- Parents tend to choose clothes for their teens.
- They don't let their children go out with friends.
- They always nag and yell.
- They always give orders on what to do and what not to do.
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